5 Tips for Getting Great Sleep With a Newborn

Congratulations, mama! You just had a baby and you’re feeling OVER THE MOON, right?!

OMG, I remember that feeling like it was yesterday. The newborn smells. The smiles in their sleep. The little, squishy toes. The yummy ear and shoulder fuzz. The tiny fingers wrapped around mine during a feeding.

UGH! It’s the best feeling in the entire world!

So, you’re living on cloud nine and then you leave the hospital to go home.

Night #1 one is tough, but you’re still amped up on hormones and adrenaline. You make it through the next week and it’s like, “Phew! That was crazy but I MADE IT. I’m a superhero and I CAN DO THIS!”.

Then, about two weeks in, reality hits. BOOM!

You’re freakin’ EXHAUSTED. A level of tired you’ve legitimately never felt before in your life. Your body hurts, your boobs hurt, your nether regions are still swollen AF and sore as hell.

Everything really starts to come into focus when the rose-colored glasses come off. But listen – YOU’VE STILL GOT THIS, okay?!

You do not have to suffer and be stuck on the hamster wheel of exhaustion for the rest of your life. So, stick with me!

After having my own kids and helping so many newborn moms (just like you!) take control over their sleep situation in those early days, I’ve learned a thing or two about how to actually get just that…REAL, RESTFUL SLEEP.

It won’t be perfect. But it will help you steal a few more hours of shut-eye than you probably got last night. Sound good? Awesome!!

Here we go…

Tip #1: Turn off the video-portion of your baby monitor. I know, this might stress you out a bit at first, but trust me. Video monitors are great until they’re not, which is usually the case when you start obsessively watching it at every moment.

Hear me out – whether or not you’re watching your child sleep will not help them sleep better or for longer stretches. And watching your child constantly means you are not sleeping…which should be your single, solitary goal at this point (aside from, ya know…snuggling your little babe!).

Believe it or not, your little one is fully capable of getting your attention. Research has shown that healthy newborn babies can cry as loud as a vacuum cleaner, which is roughly 60 decibels or so on average. That’s pretty damn loud!

Not only that, most newborn moms go through a period of heightened hearing, which is a biological change that occurs after baby is born. So, believe me – you will hear your baby if he needs you, especially if you’re room-sharing (which the AAP also recommends until your baby is 6 months old).

Side note: I have some mixed opinions on room-sharing for that long, but I’ll save that for another post.

And I know, you might be thinking, “Yeah, but what if something happens while he’s asleep and I’m not watching him?!” Statistically speaking, if your baby was born healthy, full-term, and is set up in the appropriate sleep environment, the possibility of something bad happening (like SIDS) is very low. That said, it’s also important that you follow the American Academy of Pediatrics’ (aka. AAP) guidelines for safe sleep: 

• Make sure baby is placed flat on his back for all periods of unsupervised sleep (not on his side or stomach, as this increases the risk of suffocation).

• Baby’s crib or other sleep space should have a firm, flat surface, free of pillows, blankets, stuffed animals, and any other loose items that could accidentally cause breathing difficulty or be swallowed.

• Baby should be alone in his sleep space and should not bed-share or share any sleep space with another person, including a parent.

Tip #2: If your baby is a loud sleeper, use LOTS of white noise. Most newborns make all kinds of noises in their sleep – grunting, groaning, hiccupping, yawning, squawking, gurgling.

You name it, I’ve heard it.

And most moms are so caught off guard by this and they wind up being constantly woken up because their newborn just won’t shut up! So, I always recommend using multiple white noise machines in your room to serve two purposes:

• Drown you out, so you don’t disturb your newborn. Positioning is key for this to work, so make sure it’s near your baby’s head (but not physically in their crib or bassinet). On the floor or a table next to them should work just fine.

  • And bonus – the right type of white noise (indistinct, looping sounds – like static, a fan, or rain) at the right volume (think vacuum cleaner or shower-level) helps their brain release calming hormones to promote deeper, longer sleep.

•  Eliminate excessive, non-urgent noise coming from your newborn. Like I said earlier, they’re loud little creatures and can disrupt what little sleep you’re getting faster than you can snap your fingers.

Do yourself a favor and plop a second white noise machine near your own head to keep unnecessary wake-ups to a minimum (in other words, ensuring you don’t wake up while your newborn is grunting out a fart at 2am).

This one and this one are the two white noise machines I recommend to all my moms.

Tip #3: Double up on the swaddles. Most newborns in weeks 1-3 aren’t strong enough to escape their swaddles (yet). But eventually, almost all newborns and younger infants in those first few months will start wriggling their way out. To help avoid this issue altogether, I highly recommend doubling up on the swaddles, so you (and your kiddo) can get longer stretches of sleep from the get-go.

• Start with a muslin or light cotton blanket and use whatever swaddling technique feels good to you. Just remember to keep their arms down by their sides or crossed over their chest and make it TIGHT, TIGHT TIGHT. Despite what your grandma has probably said, I have yet to meet a single newborn who doesn’t sleep better when swaddled. The trick is doing it correctly.

  •  Not sure how to do it? Here’s a great, easy tutorial using my favorite swaddle blanket ever.

• Use a more structured swaddle on top. This could be something like a Halo swaddle or SwaddleMe swaddle – really anything that will add some more confinement and reinforce the blanket underneath. This not only helps keep their arms from inching out of their mummy wrap, but also helps keep their startle reflex (aka. Moro reflex) under control, which can linger through the first 8-10 weeks.

Tip #4: Start offering a top-off feed just before bed. Newborns are notorious for cluster feeding, which is essentially non-stop nursing or feeding all day long. This can happen for a few days to a week at a time and can really take a toll on your mental and physical health, as a result.

While this is totally normal for newborns, it’s still important that you get breaks and periods to actually rest and reset. And the same goes for your little one’s digestive system. To prevent constant wake-ups from hunger during those early days, it’s sometimes helpful to start offering what I like to call “top-off” feeds.

These smaller, bite-sized feeds are offered just before sleep (naps or overnight) to promote longer stretches in two ways:

• Keeping him fuller for a longer period of time

• Allowing his digestive system to rest, which also means his body can produce sleep hormones needed to fall asleep and stay asleep effectively

So, next time you go to put your little one down, offer him a little nip off the bottle or breast beforehand for a minute or two to make sure he’s nice and full before that snooze-fest.

And that brings us to…

Tip #5: Wait it out! This is a big one and one that I think most first-time moms struggle with big time. We’re biologically programmed to jump at the first sign of our baby needing us. If you’ve ever felt that gut-wrenching pull to tend to your baby when he’s crying, you know what I’m talking about.

But here’s the thing…

Most babies develop distinct cries for different things. One cry will be for hunger. Another will be for pain or discomfort. He may even have one for just general boredom or dislike at some point. Confusing, right?!

Regardless of how many types of cries your baby has, one thing is for certain: a baby who truly needs something will continue to cry and those cries will get progressively louder.

So, my fifth and final suggestion is to wait when your baby starts fussing. Most babies don’t suddenly start screaming at the top of their lungs out of nowhere. It’s usually a slow build – starting with a fuss or squawking a bit, followed by some longer whining or intermittent little cries, until they finally work themselves up enough to say, “Hey! I NEED YOU!”.

But those early fusses or whining are where we most often jump in and immediately pick them up, thinking they need something RIGHT NOW. When in fact, more often than not, your baby is probably in between sleep cycles and trying to make that transition. Which, believe it or not, can be loud. It’s called “active sleep” and it’s when your baby is in his lightest sleep stage of the entire sleep cycle, which also means he can get a little restless and squirmy. It’s totally normal, so leave him be and wait it out a minute to see if he actually wake up or he starts to calm down naturally as he gets back into a deeper sleep state.

Quick caveat: If the squirmies and squawkies turn into full, blown crying, please do not leave your baby to cry! Infants under 3 months, need responsive parenting, so pay close attention your baby’s noises and if he’s really crying, it’s time to jump in.

Newborn sleep can be touch-and-go for a while until you really figure out your little one’s unique sleep situation and cues. But don’t get too hung up on it, mama – it will get easier over time. And it’s not endless. I promise.

What are some other tips and tricks you have up your sleeve for newborn mamas? Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments section!

And as always…

Cheers to better sleep!

PS. Did you know I offer exclusive sleep services for newborn mamas? If you’re really looking for that personalized guidance and support to walk you through the first 3 months of your baby’s life, then it doesn’t get any easier (or sweeter) than this. Book a FREE discovery call below to find out more!